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Creative Commons License
This work by Chumworth is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
June 18, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 2:36 pm UTC

Republican lawmakers on Sunday called on U.S. Energy Secretary Bill Richardson to resign, after two computer hard drives containing nuclear secrets which had been missing from the Los Alamos National Laboratory were found behind a copier machine in the same high-security area in which they had been stored. President Bill Clinton did not respond when asked by reporters in Washington on Sunday if he still has confidence in Richardson. 

Clinton did say that he was quite disappointed that somebody who had spent so much time in his administration “wasn't better at hiding things.”

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 18, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 4:33 am UTC

Australia's outback hero Crocodile Dundee is set to make a comeback with actor Paul Hogan returning to Australia this August to make a third movie in the popular series, the Queensland government said on Sunday.

In fact, the filming will be part of a new medal sport at the upcoming Summer Olympics, “Milking an OK Movie Idea for Far Too Long.”

Sylvester Stallone will be representing the United States in this event, as he shoots “Rocky VI” down under.

The Dundee character was based on Northern Territory bushman Rodney Ansell, who died last year in a shootout with police. 

It's a good thing he's already dead or else he'd probably want to kill himself when he heard there's going to be another lame movie based on his life.

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 7, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 9:12 pm UTC

Calling the world's largest software maker “untrustworthy,” a federal judge Wednesday ordered Microsoft to be broken into two smaller companies to prevent it from violating state and federal antitrust laws in the future.

As soon as she heard about the ruling and in particular the phrase “broken into”, Attorney General Janet Reno decided that she would personally oversee enforcement of the order.

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 7, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 7:44 pm UTC

Atlanta Braves reliever John Rocker, recently demoted to the minor leagues for threatening the reporter who wrote the story exposing Rocker's offensive comments against gays, minorities and foreigners, has said that he's considering retiring and becoming a stockbroker.

He got the stockbroker idea after seeing the movie “Wall Street” in which all of the stockbrokers are white guys.

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 6, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 7:39 pm UTC

A recent study by Rutgers University found that, unlike previous generations, romance and marriage are out while casual sex and low-commitment relationships are in for American youth.

On the bright side, this was the first survey of youths in recent memory where the respondents said that they “wanted to be like the president.”

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 6, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 7:37 pm UTC

About 200 passengers aboard Disney's Magic ship became sick during a three-day cruise, Disney officials said Tuesday. 

The officials blamed the illnesses on the droppings from a “very large rodent.”

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 6, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 7:31 pm UTC

A 1909 baseball card of Pittsburgh Pirates shortstop Honus Wagner is expected to fetch up to $1 million at auction.

That'd make Wagner more valuable than the any of the current Pirates.

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 6, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 6:09 pm UTC

Socorro Del Carmen, Sharon Stone's former housekeeper, pleaded guilty on Tuesday to stealing jewelry and other items from the actress.

Ironically, Stone might not have become such a big star if Del Carmen hadn't stolen her underpants during the filming of “Basic Instinct.”

-Chum    [link | comment]

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June 6, 2000.
  Web Posted at: 6:09 pm UTC

Michael Abram, the 33-year-old man accused of stabbing former Beatle George Harrison in the chest in December last year, pleaded not guilty to attempting to murder Harrison and his wife at their home in southern England.

Abram claimed that he was only trying to “see what made Harrison tick.”

-Chum    [link | comment]

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