December 5, 2005.
Ode to a Treat
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Do I mean Christmas time? Hanukah time? Continental Tire Bowl time? No, no, and nope, but you’re close! No, if it’s December that means it’s time for Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes! You may recall my ode to these little bits of heaven a couple of years back; check it out here.
Ohhhhhh, mama. Got the holiday blues? Feeling down? Well go out right now and treat yourself to a piece of Little Debbie. You won’t regret it. Oh no, you won’t. Trust daddy on this one.
December 4, 2005.
I’m sure all of you watched the TV event of the decade last week, Oprah Winfrey on with David Letterman for the first time in 16 years. If you didn’t, well what the hell were you thinking? In anticipation of this event I was busily writing Oprah jokes for Dave all last week. Luckily, one joke did make it on air! In order to get the joke, however, you have to know that last year Oprah gave every member of her audience a free car.
So knowing that little tidbit, and that Dave has made many references to it since, I wrote up the following joke that Dave Letterman opened his monologue with on Friday’s Late Show (12/2/05).
I don’t like to talk about people when they’re not here, but last night’s audience was really unpleasant.
They got downright ugly when they realized Oprah wasn’t going to be giving away any cars.
Click here to hear it live (format: MP3, size: 207kb) or check it out on my Late Night Joke page.
I believe this was my first Oprah joke! Now if she were to get caught lying to the feds, well, we might just have another Martha Stewart on our hands!