Well, Christmas is finally here which means one thing: I’m done writing Christmas jokes for another year! Hallelujah! All December long I was writing and submitting jokes to the Late Show based on the birth of a certain highly talented carpenter. Sadly, just about all of them were rejected, like this little comedy gem:
Earlier today I got a Christmas card from Regis.
It’s a lovely card. It has a picture of Regis surrounded by all of his money.
And this one:
Here’s a gift idea for any last minute shoppers out there.
Down in Times Square this year the hookers are offering gift certificates.
However, after striking out all month, I finally managed to get one on air when Dave Letterman told this joke on Friday’s show (12/22/06).
The Christmas season is here which means I have lots of people to tip.
Every year I go through the same dilemma: how much should I tip the guy who dry cleans my hairpiece?
When in doubt, make a joke about Dave’s hair. This one’s for you, Santa!-Chum [link | comment]