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Creative Commons License
This work by Chumworth is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
March 25, 2008.
  Web Posted at: 1:21 pm UTC
Another Black Sox Scandal

As if poor dumb Eliot Spitzer isn’t having a tough enough month as it is, now we find out this week that he likes to keep his calf-length black socks on during sex with prostitutes. Personally, I would never do that; I hate calf length socks and I hate, even more, black socks. I’m more of an ankle-length white sock fella, which should tell you just about all you need to know about me. My own opinion aside, I figure at the rates Eliot was paying for those girls, he had the right to wear whatever the heck he wanted on his tootsies.

In any case, this little factoid is obvious late night talk show monologue joke material. So it was no surprise when Dave Letterman told this joke I wrote about it on Monday’s Late Show (3/24/08):

We learned this week that former Governor Eliot Spitzer would wear his black socks during sex.

For me the only thing I keep on is my hairpiece.

Here’s the audio:

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

You can also watch the video of the entire monologue here.

Can’t wait to hear what David Paterson liked to wear he had sex with his mistress(es)…

-Chum    [link | comment]

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March 20, 2008.
  Web Posted at: 2:50 pm UTC
It Takes A Joke

By this time I think we’ve all got a sense of the differences between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. She’s a woman, he’s a man; she’s white, he’s black; he wears pants suits, she wears … shorter pants suits. You get the idea.

But, aside from both being Democratic Senators, they’re also more alike than you realize. Here, I’ll let David Letterman explain how, using a joke I wrote for him that he told on Wednesday’s Late Show (3/19/08).

If you think about it, Hillary and Obama have a lot in common.

Both are lawyers, both are senators, and neither one is sleeping with Bill Clinton.

Here’s the audio:

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

You can also watch the video of the entire monologue here.

I submitted this joke to the show back in late February. When Dave told it, it took me a second to remember that I had written it. I love when that happens…

-Chum    [link | comment]

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